Thursday, May 13, 2010

It's been quite some time...

So it's been forever since I blogged.  Too much going on, to many places to write, share pics, etc that the blog has just gone by the waste side.  Sorry if you were following us.  If you didn't know already, Vance is doing wonderfully.  He was born Monday (fair of face and boy is he CUTE!) 11/23/2009.  They did an echo immediately after he was born but took him for another one after we got to spend about an hour with him.  He was gone more than 2 hours when they said I was "OK" to get out of bed to make the trip over to children's hospital where he was in the NICU. I doubt I was ready because I bled horribly and 6 weeks later I found out my incision had come open inside the uterus.  But we went so we could hold our precious baby boy.  Not knowing how long we'd have.  We were so elated he was finally here.  Everyone laughing, smiling, snapping pics like crazy.


We weren't there long before they said they had the results of the echo.  It had taken them more than a hour to go through the 200 images they had taken.  All of our worst fears, Vance's heart just had too many problems, more than we initially expected and he could end up severely retarded from the delays of normal development because of lengthy hospital stays so we stood by our decision not to do any surgeries.  We'd just take him home and love on him as much as we could. So they send him down to be with us instead of staying in NICU. The girls couldn't have spent anytime with him if they hadn't since they weren't allowing anyone under 18 in Children's hospital unless they were a patient. All the more reason.  Everyone visited, we took over 300 pictures the first day of his life.  Good thing since on the second day they said babies that are ductal dependent only last on average 24 to 48 hours.  They were sending us home the next day. I was so happy to be going home with him to the girls that I didn't realize they were sending him home to die. We came home with hospice. And about three hours after they left we called them again.  Vance was turning blue.  I was scared out of my mind.  Here we go I thought.  Vu and I just curled up in the bed with him and held his hands.  Both of us not saying anything but feeling every second. Had it not been sad it would have been the most intimate experience of my life.  It was very surreal, almost as if every nerve in your body was part of this emotional experience and tied to these two other people you love so dearly. Of course, like any kid does just before they got here he started looking better and was kind of pink again. Maybe us surrounding him with our love gave his little heart the energy to keep going.  That was the last time i ever saw him look that way. He's been pink ever since.....

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