Heart Catheter Tomorrow (5/26/2010)

Anxiety is going to take over me tonight.  Vance had a normal cardio appointment scheduled for today.  Since I was downtown I planned on seeing a few other parents who were there;  A couple who just had a new HLHS baby boy yesterday and another whose baby girl has had 5 surgeries and has been struggling since Vance was in the hospital with her back in March.  We were doing the routine checks: height, weight, BP and O2 saturations.  His O2 was down. But still not out of the range they said was normal, but still 10% less than the last few times. I didn't think too much of it. After a while you start to tune out stuff like that unless it's really major.  We did his ECHO which to me looked better than the last time, less fluid.  So I figured we were in for good news. Set up the cath in a few weeks and then on to the Glen in a few months.  Well sometimes you get what you ask for but it's not exactly what you expected.  They said he is out growing his bands, which were always mean to be a temporary fix. But I could tell it wasn't something they were really wanting to happen so soon. I had felt all this time that the cath was just a means to an end, just a way to get to the next step, but for some reason I can't get over the way it's just so final.  Either they say they can do it or they say the can't.  Basically if he will live or die....so hard.